Love, Pleasure, & Grief
I am hibernating.
Many people are leaving behind “New Year, New Me” to find their flow with nature. Here in the northern hemisphere, the ground is still cold and the tree branches are bare.
I have been deep in my writing and spiritual practice. The name of the game this winter has been REST. It is so hard for me to let go of my constant desire to “put out” work. It is hard to let go of my van-life journey to focus on my medical needs. It is hard to stay still.
I am a generator, a Virgo, an artist. I have made a big shift from living in a busy city where I know so many people to a small town with a much smaller life.
I am finally experiencing the stillness I have been running from for years.
My fear was that if I took time for rest, I would cease to exist entirely. I wouldn’t make any impact on the world because I wouldn’t be “participating”.
The irony is that in my rest, I have created more quality writing and art than I ever did when I was running around trying to be a part of other people’s lives. While I love my old life as a sex-positivity entertainer and show producer, I couldn’t imagine myself as I am now doing those things.
All of the ideas about bodily autonomy, sexuality, and consent are still with me in a much more grounded way. The spells I did in those days for liberation are still at work in the lives of the people that witnessed it. I know now some of the answers to the questions I was asking in my early 20s about love, pleasure, and grief. And I know now how to cope with the tragic reality of unanswerable questions.
I still exist.
I have been channeling more often and with more confidence. I have had quiet time to take inventory of the last 28 years. As I approach my Saturn return (literally right around the corner), I am reviewing all of the ways that I have stayed afloat. I am taking inventory of all of the skills I have learned, modalities I have practiced, research I have nearly drowned in.
All of my life I have been collecting ways to process the immense experience of life on this planet. As I move into 2023, I would love to take spiritual seekers with me.
On February 1st, I will be launching a month-long guided initiation designed specifically for the cold, deep winter. No live workshops to attend, no workbooks or workouts, no “coaching calls” or whatever the fuck.
Just you, a blanket, a journal, and a fun little drink- Reading, listening, and feeling your feelings.
Rather than forcing energy toward some endless pursuit of “self-improvement”, this curriculum is an invitation to go DEEPER into the psyche. To explore the underground. To get comfortable with what comes up when we are down there.
Following a Thread of Healing, this initiation will explore LOVE, PLEASURE, and GRIEF in the context of inner alchemy. You will have the option to get 1:1 support during the initiation or just read and watch the material at your own pace.
Each week you will receive a ritual guide that accommodates different energy levels (including sleepy and slow✨), journal prompts, and videos that will gently move you through healing wounds around love, pleasure, and grief.
You can register now here and start receiving content as early as Jan 20th or you can learn more about the offering here.
